About Me

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Florida, United States
I am a Hopeful Bride of Christ and I long for the day I can dedicate all of my life to Him. I have been actively discerning religious life for about 4 years now and I have been accepted to enter the Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Church. I hope to begin formation soon and beg your prayers that my student loans do not keep me from entering. With your help and prayers I hope that my entrance to the SMMC will soon be reality. Rest assured that you are all in my thoughts and prayers - most especially those young men and women discerning their vocations, whether to the religious life, priesthood or married life. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers as I continue this journey toward Him.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Win one of my Rosaries!!

All right folks it's here!! The long awaited contest for one of my lovely creations.  As you all know I am trying to increase traffic to my website www.rosarieschaplets.com and subsequently sell some rosaries to help me get to the convent faster.  I promised a contest soon and so here are the rules.  Since you've liked the page you automatically have one entry.  However you can get up to six entries and below is how you can get additional entries:

  • One additional entry for every friend you invite to like who actually like the page.  (submit friend's name so that this can be verified - this method has a 3 entry limit) 
  • If you have a blog and you blog about the site or the Facebook page, you get two additional entries. (submit blog link for verification)
  • If you tweet about the website or the Facebook page, you get one entry. (submit tweet link for verification)

Remember, folks who like the Facebook page are automatically entered so if you have not done so, go ahead and like the page to be entered.

**The prize is a handmade St. Joseph rosary paired with green glass beads.  A very lucky winner will get this for personal use or even a gift.  Good Luck!!!**

p.s.  For those of you who read my blog but don't follow, here is a special chance to get even more chances.  If you follow my blog and leave a comment to that effect, you get two entries!!  If you are already a follower, leave a comment and you get an entry.

The deadline to enter is June 4th; winner will be announced June 6th.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Self-Inflicted Frustration

Jesus is considered by scholars such as Weber ...Image via Wikipedia
I am going on my 4th year at my job and for the past year and a  half, without fail whenever this time of year comes up (well truthfully this happens at the beginning/end of every semester) I find myself growing more and  more frustrated with having to wait to enter the convent.  My frustration not only comes from the fact that I have a longing to start living my yes but also from a "enough of this already" mentality.  I want to be done with the "my professor is unfair", "It's not my fault I failed my math class" and all the other day to day dealings.  I usually spend a week or two being so frustrated at every little thing that I sometimes become pretty much impossible to deal with because I am too busy throwing myself a pity party for one.  Weeks later I will reflect on it and realize that I should have accepted the here and now and recognize the Lord speaking to me. 

This frustration comes from a lot of different places, it comes from my eagerness and true desire to begin life as a religious, to begin doing everything for Him alone (and then of course I realize I can start living my life for Him alone in my day-to-day dealings); my extremely impatient nature, the fear of not being able to protect my vocation any longer (I think that is my biggest fear - I feel this urgency to enter now in order not to "lose" my vocation.)  Looking at my track record with relationships I now see I am a commitment-phobe and though at the beginning of my discernment I was ready to jump all in I am now afraid I will not be able to fully commit to the Lord; and then there is the fact that I just don't want to wait anymore.  Though a part of me wanted to enter last year, I made the decision to wait because I felt that I wasn't spiritually ready.  I couldn't wait for August 22, 2011 I was even counting down!  And then I met with Mother and we both decided waiting until August 22, 2012 will be best.  Yes I trust the Lord's timing but sometimes it can be hard to wake up everyday trusting the Lord when it feels like the one thing you want, the one thing you are called to be is getting further and further away.   

Then I start to think about these "obstacles" and depending on my mood I either look at it as an opportunity to persevere and fight for my vocation or I see it as an indication that perhaps my commitment issues might get in the way of my persevering.  This starts the frustration process all over again because then I start to want to enter immediately in an effort to squash these fears before I get in my way.  Of course I recognize that I am not able to persevere on my own but that is usually down the road after freaking myself out ten times over.

This morning as I pulled in the parking lot I started thinking about this cycle of frustration, of feeling like I have had enough of this job already and then I realized that Jesus had to wait waaaay longer than I did.  I mean the man was preaching and teaching others at the age of 12 so obviously he was ready.  Yet he had to wait more than a decade before beginning his ministry because following and adhering to the Father's timing was more important.  In His infinite wisdom God the Father wanted to truly prepare Christ for his ministry.  Whatever the Lord is calling me to be - In what way is he is calling me to live as a religious? - I am realizing I am still not ready to fully live it out.  I really need to continue to  remember that; deep down I know the wait doesn't have much to do with commitment issues or "tests"  I know it is another opportunity for the Lord to continue to shower me with graces and blessings because He's been doing just that; most importantly it is a time of preparation, deep preparation for whatever He is calling me to.  Sadly, I have a tendency to give in to the negative thinking at the beginning and then start spiraling down before catching myself halfway through.

I thank the Lord for giving me the grace to realize what is going on and I know I need to double my prayers and lean on Him even more but that can get really hard to do at times.  I wonder if this is how my sister-in-law feels when my brother goes on deployment for 7 months at a time.  Deep down knowing you will be with the one you love but sometimes losing hope and starting to despair.  I definitely sympathize with military families in a way I never had before.  Please keep me in your prayers that I lean on the Lord even more during these times of "testing".

Pax,
Hopeful

Monday, May 23, 2011

Newsflash! I have ADD

OK so I have been working on this major data analysis project for about 5 days now and I can't help doing everything else.  First I had to clean my office because I literally couldn't think with all of the mess around me.  Then I started thinking about everything else I was supposed to do and so now I am like a day and half behind.

AAARRRRGGGGGHHHH!!!!

I blame it partially on myself.  I should have locked my door, I should not have opened Outlook and I should have sent my calls to voice mail.  The rest of the blame goes to other people, I can't exactly pinpoint it right now because this is a fleeting attempt at passing the buck....  I will stay here till 7 in hopes of shaving off that half day deficit.

Okay Rambling - OVER.

Pax,
Hopeful

Sunday, May 22, 2011

The website is up


I don't think I mentioned that I am working on a website to sell my rosaries.  Over the last couple of weeks I have been working intently on updating the website and thanks to the help of a friend it is complete and is looking very nice.  I just spent twelve hours making rosaries (and a couple of bracelets) in an effort to increase my inventory and I am very sore but very excited.  Like a proud mama, I absolutely love every piece and I think they are all special however there one that I find particularly cute.

This rosary is made of 6mm glass beads and the Pater beads are made from 6mm gold toned beads.  Like this particular one most of my rosaries are one-of-a kind spur of the moment creations however I do have some designs with more than one rosary available.

Feel free to drop by the website and browse my catalog.  I am working on growing it significantly over the next few days so keep an eye out for more things to come.  

I have set up a Facebook page to spread the word about the website; I invite you to like the page and share it with your friends and family (or even blog about it)  I will be holding a contest in a few days and the prize will be one of my unique creations.  Participation and eligibility rules will be coming soon along with an uploaded picture of the design.

Pax,
Hopeful

Wasted Opportunity

This past week was one of the hardest weeks for me in many aspects.  I was the most stressed I had ever been at work (I usually handle the day-to-day bustle with a calm demeanor but somehow this week was different)  I found myself getting irritated at the drop of a hat.  Sadly this irritation came from the fact that I had set these standards for the folks that I deal with and somehow made myself the one to determine how others should behave.  It would not have been so difficult if it stopped at getting irritated, what makes it worse is the fact that in my frustration and anger I get short with the people I am dealing with and I throw all desires to be charitable out of the window.

Every morning I say a prayer to the sacred heart asking for the Lord's help in growing in the virtue of charity and humility.  I know very well that when we ask the Lord to help us grow in the virtues (patience, humility, charity etc.) we are given the opportunity.  Patience is not given to us at the drop of a button but rather we are presented with opportunities that seem to try our patience and it is up to us to turn to the Lord and to follow His examples of charity, patience and sympathy.

Knowing this, I wasted countless opportunities this past week, opportunities to love; opportunities to be patient and humble.  I found myself getting super irritated at a co-worker who I believed was emailing me too much asking for follow-up on certain tasks and issues we were working on.  By the 5th email I was ready to blow and blow up I did.  I went for a walk around the campus and my friend and walking buddy got to hear a never-ending venting session.  Afterward it was as if blindfolds were taken off of my eyes, I realized that all these emails I found irritating were opportunities to be patient, to turn to Christ and ask Him to help me respond to this person with love.  Right away I knew that I had to go to confession and thankfully I was able to receive the sacrament of reconciliation before evening mass.  I have made the strong resolve to not give in to my anger and to rely on Christ in my moments of anger.

As I do every day and every week I have made the resolve to slow down and take the time to recognize and appreciate opportunities to grow in the virtues rater than flying off the handle when I find myself getting too irritated.  I have started by reciting the face prayer by Jim Pinto Jr. and it is a wondeful reminder to me of my responsibility as a lover of Christ.  I have included it below, I hope you find it as much of an inspiration to your day as I have found it to be to mine.

In Christ, our Love
Hopeful

Face Prayer

Heavenly Father, I embrace your grace this day,
So that I might not:
Think of another,
Speak to another or
Touch another,
without first looking for
Your Face in the other.
I ask all this through
Jesus Christ:
God Incarnate,
God with Skin,
God made Poor,
God with a Face. Amen!
 Jim Pinto, Jr.

Saturday, May 7, 2011

It is done

I finished the Franciscan rosary and I find it so beautiful that it is hard to think about giving it away.  I am hoping they like it and that whoever wins it uses it often.  Nerves are making it a bit hard to fall asleep but I must give in to sleep so that I am refreshed tomorrow.  I am still waffling about my talk; I have so much I want to share!  I am trusting that the Lord will guide me.  Please keep my intentions in your prayers.

I have included some pictures of the finished rosary.

Enjoy!
Hopeful

(I found these beads at a close-out sale at the local bead store.  The Pater beads are square-ish and the Ave beads are flat heartshaped.  The center is of Our Lady of Lourdes and Bernadette, on the back of it is water from Lourdes.  How cool is that?!!!)  I am hoping to go back and find some more beads for a chaplet or maybe a bracelet.



Friday, May 6, 2011

Prayers please

Hi All,

I have been seriously neglecting my blog!  Things have been a bit busy on my end with the end of the semester which automatically means things are super busy at work and on top of that I am trying to plan VBS and launching my rosaries website (I will be sure to share it when it is fully finished)

About three months ago I was asked to prayerfully consider being a speaker at the next Magnificat meeting that the ladies in my town were having and I thought about it and said yes.  Well the dreaded... I mean long-awaited date is tomorrow, May 7th and I am getting sooooo nervous.  I have gone over my speech fifteen thousand times (exaggerating here) and I can't seem to be satisfied enough with my topic!  So I am asking for prayers.  

On top of it all I decided that I would make a Franciscan Rosary for the ladies to raffle off.  Another problem, my perfectionist self has redesigned this sucker like 20 times (not kidding) and I have started and undone it even more times.  I finally decided on the beads (pictures later) and I am halfway through with it.  I will finish it this afternoon so that I can critique it some more and have some time for my neurosis to take over.    I must say that I am loving how it is turning out, the Ave beads are this flat light pink heart shaped and the Pater are squarish.  I guess you guys can decide the shape when you see the pictures.  I also have to make a pamphlet for the Seraphic Rosary because not a lot of people are familiar with it.  I've done some research on materials and I didn't quite like what I saw so I figure I will make my own pamphlet to go with it.  Hey who knows, maybe I can start distributing it with the ones I sell :)

Anyways, Just wanted to ask for prayers and wish you all a happy Friday.

In Christ, our Hope
Hopeful